dennis scharnberg

in formation

Andrew Tertullian, Pandora’s Ponderous Puns.

“Men have died from time to time,” said Paul, in a lilting voice. “And tell me, please, dear Phyllis: Why, oh why, oh why?”

“You mean why do people want to quote the Elizabethans?”

Edward Valerian, The Empire Is Maintained.

“They don’t like to hear much talk about that staircase, sir. That’s where old Enderby took his fall. Mum’s the word.”

Adrian Caliban, The Magnificent Egglestons.

Philosophy is a profession.

Godfrey Tooke, Collected Aphorisms.

Why do we want?

Godfrey Tooke, Collected Aphorisms.

Actors convince.

Godfrey Tooke, Collected Aphorisms.

That was back when he was working out the details of his EPG, or estimated profundity gradient. It had something to do with how many profound observations were experienced per conversational hour at get-togethers of the Bloomsbury Group.

James Finial, The Misadventures of Caroline.

“Damn it, Watkins! It’s what you’re always going on about. I mean, nowadays, who cares about some old coot named Homer who was paid to sing foolish poems? Really, man, who bloody cares?”

Adrian Caliban, The Magnificent Egglestons.

Book publishing in 18th century England was like selling turnips. It was a constant scramble.

Brisbane Crowe, The Life and Times of a Hack.

BTI: (small upper-case letters preferred) an abbreviation for the era before the internet.

Clive Morrow, A Crustacean’s Dictionary.