dennis scharnberg

oh thou pluckest

Time is everywhere.

Godfrey Tooke, Collected Aphorisms.

styles of lying

Perhaps Kant had a theory about what the sea looks like.

Godfrey Tooke, Collected Aphorisms.

color me barbara

“We are afraid, sir, that we can provide you with only an estimate of how very sorry we are.”

J. Haviland Hunter III, The History of Miss Judy and James.

cold penetrating gaze

Mr. Gulden’s room was untidy, his clothing was untidy, his thinking was untidy.

Anson Trimm, Carlos the Forgetful.

recitation of lies


foot’s tool

Andrew Tertullian, Pandora’s Ponderous Puns.

way of being

Cowlishaw’s solution to speech was to engage in a sequence of incoherent honking noises. Sometimes loud, sometimes soft. “To hell with words,” he would quip, later.

Charles Jeffrey Yett, Writing in Miniature—Vol. Three.

hitching a ride

In being wrong, no one sounds as clever as Nietzsche.

Harold Nazworthy, Weidemeyer’s Admiral.

heretofore unmentioned asterisk


Andrew Tertullian, Pandora’s Ponderous Puns.

noticing the squirrels

“Garland? Gar? Where are you? What are you up to?”

“I am trying to devise an entirely new language, if you must know. Now, will you please just leave me alone!”

Augustus Bligh, Crawlspace.

cutting edge morals

Doubt the truth, Janice. I know it sounds all wrong. But give it a try.”

Nicholas Crisp, Unfit for Murder.